Two co-leaders of a team recently came to me asking for help. They described all the things not working well in their team meetings.
- Lack of participation
- For those joining virtually, no cameras on and no participation
- Meetings going off track, off topic, and off time
- Individual team members monopolizing the conversation while everyone else tunes out
- One or two people accusing the team leaders of not listening when their point is not adopted
Any of that sound familiar?
I asked these co-leaders what they’d like to see happen instead. It took them a minute to answer. One of them said quietly, “I don’t think I’ve thought about that before.” When they were ready, they painted a picture of a team that is aligned. A team that has a common understanding of the rules of engagement. A team that has agreed to abide by a common set of expectations.
Too often, we skip this step. We make assumptions about everyone operating out of a common understanding. But… we haven’t taken the steps to check and see if that exists. Instead, everyone operates by their own unspoken and unwritten set of rules. Those are forged from their own assumptions, behavior modeled by previous leaders, or other reflections of their life experiences. And while that’s a totally normal and human thing to do, it can lead to what these co-leaders are experiencing. Unproductive meetings which are undermining the trust and effectiveness of their team.
What can we do instead?
Take the guesswork and assumptions out of it. Write the rules.
There are two categories of rules I invite you to consider: Process and Norms.
Process rules define how activities will be carried out in the team.
Norms define the ways in which team members agree to interact.
In other words, we benefit from two kinds of rules. Some that help us know how to do what we need to do, and others that help us know how to engage with each other in the process. Both are important for creating alignment in any team.
What unwritten rules govern your team interactions?
If you were to create and agree to some written rules in your team, how would things change?
Don’t let assumptions govern your team dynamics. Get everyone on the same page and watch the engagement and confidence rise.
Want some help? Let’s talk.
